If you’re a perfectionist or you’re in a relationship with one, today’s interview with Darlene Lancer will be essential for your relationship. As we share in the interview, we struggle with this topic in our own relationship. Chase can be a perfectionist, and although he is perfect to me, there are times when it can negatively impact our relationship. However, after talking with Darlene, we both feel more equipped to handle potential conflicts arising from both our imperfections.

Housekeeping Notes: We’ve created a Facebook Group: Love Tribe

The Love Tribe community is made up of I Do Podcast listeners and was created to help support you in making your relationship {even} better. We encourage you to share your success stories, tips and heartache. Although every relationship is DIFFERENT – be each other’s inspiration. We hope you join our group here!


“Strive for continuous improvement, instead of perfection.” – Kim Collins, World Champion Track and Field Sprinter


Darlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and expert author on relationships and codependency. Shes counseled individuals and couples for 30 years and coaches internationally. Her books include Conquering Shame and Codependency, Codependency for Dummies, 10 Steps to Self-Esteem, How to Beat Perfectionism and many more.

In this episode we discuss relationship advice topics that include:

  • How unrealistically high standards can hurt your relationship.
  • Why becoming aware of self-talk and beliefs is important in dealing with perfectionism.
  • Learn the type of perfectionist you or your partner are in order to improve the relationship.
  • How to work with your inner critic.
  • Learn how you or your partner can become a healthy perfectionist that does not damage the relationship.
  • Why challenging your beliefs can be a valuable exercise in improving your relationship.
  • And much more!

Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge


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Audible: Use the link below, and sign up for a free 30-day trial and one free audiobook download! You will have to enter your CC information, but you can just cancel the trial at the end of the month if you don’t like it and not pay a dime. There are a ton of great relationship audiobooks on Audible.com. Consider downloading The 5 Love Languages for your free download. Audibletrial.com/idopodcast

If you love the show, please subscribe in iTunes and leave a review! It really helps, and allows us to keep bringing you these episodes each week! – Chase & Sarah

Darlene’s Daily Tool

Tell your partner what you appreciate in them.

Relationship Advice Resource

Codependency For Dummies

How to Beat Perfectionism

Advice for Newlyweds

Talk to each other.

Advice for Single Listeners

Work on becoming happy in your own life in order to attract the partner that’s right for you.

Interview Links

Darlene’s website

If you enjoyed the show, please subscribe and leave a review in iTunes!